Bittersweet..

I'm supposed to be happy, and I am happy... I'm not just happy though. I have other feelings. These feelings are absolutely separate from the joy I feel. I love having a reason to be happy. I just hate these moments where you have a fantastic reason to be happy and everyone around you is happy, but there's something that upsets only you. This thing doesn't impinge on anyone else but you. I just wish that I could be happy and be nothing else but happy. Just for a little while. But of course there is always something standing in my way. If only I could just lock those things to the deep dark depths of my mind so they don't perturb me any longer. Unfortunately I'm forced to think about everything good and bad, persistently...