I am alright with stating the obvious, College is a new experience full of all sorts of things that you never expect. The people are new and different, the lifestyle is new and different, the procedures are new and different, and most of all the lessons you learn are new and different. There are ways to prepare yourself for all this new and different that will bombard your life, but no one can be completely prepared. Most of the change is very good for us 18-19-year-olds leaving home and entering a completely new world, but it can be extremely hard. Sure, the extra work and responsibility makes things difficult, but I mean hard in the way that facing the truth can be hard, or struggles can be hard. Struggle is a very good adjective for how it can be sometimes, a struggle. I have compiled two of some of the important lessons I have learned over the first 3/4 of my freshman year (I am sure many more will be learned, a lot can occur over 2 months). I also have many more that have crossed my mind, but I have not quite put into words quite yet. Expect a "part 2" post soon.
1. Don't change who you are.
Okay, now this must come with a disclaimer. This does not mean that you are always correct. This does not mean you are flawless. This does not mean to stop improving yourself. I simply mean that you should improve yourself while keeping what truly makes your personality what it is, and only changing things because YOU believe you should. Too often, people adjust themselves to fit in, and yes, there are circumstances, especially in this time of change in which you must adapt, but you are still the you that you have grown to be. The scenario works like this: You come in to college and happen to find some people that you think could be your new friends, so you spend lots of time together. You find something that really connects all of you, and that is what you latch on to. Suddenly something that was just one of your hobbies or focuses becomes your number one priority and that isn't who you really are. Thus, the new "friendships" you have created around this thing are not quite as meaningful, and suddenly you are lost in relationship, and are no longer sure of yourself. It is sad but true of so many people. But a good lesson to learn none-the-less.
2. Tolerance is hard to develop
While you have to adjust your habits and lifestyles to fit this new place and life, you will keep many of the habits you are used to. While where you come from may be diverse, it isn't diverse enough to prepare you for the lifestyle differences of all the new people in college. It may not be obvious, but people of one area tend to be similar or at least share similar lifestyles. When you put people from different areas into one place there can be some conflict. For example, your hometown may be of middle class, full of diverse people, but mostly of the same socioeconomic status. Once at school, especially if it is a wealthier private school in a better-off area, those around you probably weren't all brought up the same way, their standards, living style, and spending habits will probably look different than your own. Developing the right tolerance of differences is where these differences can get dangerous. On one side of things, you can start to adopt their habits that do not fit your lifestyle. If you start to spend like someone who is better-off financially or has mommy and daddy to cover things, you will be in for a rude awakening when your wallet takes that hit. On the other hand, you could remain so set in your ways that the habits and mentalities of others can get on your nerves much quicker. These attitudes that you are not used to, whether good or bad, will get annoying to you because they are new, and you have not learned to tolerate them. This exposure of new and different lifestyles experienced during college is good for building strong but balanced tolerance, to practice both good judgement as well as acceptance.
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