I Wish I Were Stupid-er

"Oh woah, WOAH! Another misleading blog title with a hidden meaning?! Miss Sarah, what a shock!" - Said my sarcasm.

I know a few people, and I am sure everyone does, that are total risk takers. They do not worry about possible consequences, they are not constantly asking what if, and they do not worry about what people think about them. To many, myself included, that sounds kind of stupid, and a good way to get into trouble, or harmed, or killed. Well those are extreme situations, but this idea of being spontaneous and not worrying about things MAYBE going wrong, is something I admire in those who live this way.

I have a friend who recently drove to another state to meet up with a bunch of people he had never met but had the shared interest of photography, and spent a week camping and shooting with these new people. Just a bunch of random strangers doing what they love. I can look at that situation and think of things that could have gone wrong, but they seemed to have a wonderful time and produce great art. I am so envious of that opportunity for adventure, and that he took it, seemingly without hesitation.

I am a worrier, and I do not like that about myself. I worry about what worrying will do to me. I wish I could be, and wan to try to be a bit more adventurous and get a little "stupid-er" as I would think that seems. I do not want to become some ridiculous young adult living by "YOLO", but someone who is strong and confident enough that worries do not stand in the way of something that could be amazing, a whole lot of fun, and life changing.

Stuck in between

I feel as though I am stuck in an "in between" sort of place in many areas of my life, I am no longer one thing, but not to the next place yet. It is sort of a frustrating place to be, because I am confused as to what I should be doing.

Living at school during the year and home during the summer has put me in a place where I feel like I am old enough that I know friends my age living on their own, but I do not feel ready to not be living at home. This makes finding the right level of independence frustrating, I do not know what things I should still come to my family for, and what things I should handle on my own. This also makes it hard to tell if I am failing or succeeding at being an independent individual. Are there things I should be doing on my own, without help?

Summer itself is an in-between time and because I am living at home for just 3 short months of summer, I find a conflict of what I should be doing. I feel like summer is a time to be spontaneous and have some fun. Being away from home, summer is a time to see people I do not get to throughout the year. I get to live at home and spend time with my family, but go out and do things with my friends. I have found myself in a conflict of how do I catch up with everyone, and spend time with all of the people I love fairly? I want to be spontaneous and just make random plans with people and do fun things, but then I am never home, and never see my family. Unfortunately my family is a group of busy people so we are hardly all at home at once, so not going out tends to result in being home alone. It seems an unsolvable problem, someone is going to get left out. It almost feels like I am stretching myself too thin in trying to please everyone. I want to keep commitments and plans I make with someone, but still do what I need to at home, and spend time with people I want to, and who want to spend time with me, and still trying to figure out how to treat different people who I have different relationships, which is another area I feel an in between state in.

I apologize for the ramble that turned into.

5 Reasons I Love Storms

In the past week 3 storms have hit my local area, more intense than we have had in a long time. There was lightning, pouring rain, up to 70mph winds, hail in some areas, and a whole lot of damage.

The ceiling of Cowan Hall at Otterbein University

The front lawn of Towers at Otterbein University

My Back porch after only the first gust of wind

So the damage is not what I enjoy about storms, and the millions of people without power is not either, but I really do love storms. And here is why:

1. They add a little bit of excitement to your day. We obviously do not put storms into our schedule, and they are not routine at all. There are times that we can tell by the radar that a storm will arrive sometime this evening, but we never know for sure what they are going to do. Some storms we never even expect to come, one of the 3 was just that. This first storm arrived so suddenly after a bright sunny and VERY hot day. After a dull afternoon, watching the storm come in, the power going out, and the display of lightning and wind acted as sort of an entertainment.

2. Relaxation. Okay, this is sort of the opposite of number one, but it applies to the feeling before and after a big storm, or smaller, less eventful storms. I love the sound and feel of rain. I could sit (INSIDE) and watch rain, listen to music, and sometimes write for hours. I take the best naps when it rains, and I just feel in a very thoughtful and peaceful mood. I also love to watch lightning and hear thunder. I think it is the perfect background noise for relaxing. My favorite is the quiet rolling thunder as a storm is coming or going. The wavering lightning flashes in the distance are beautiful and calming. In the hot summer days of thick moist air, right before night time you can see it in the distance and it is wonderful.

3. Power Outages. (This one is sort of a love-hate relationship). When the power is out my family usually gathers in one area so to share the small bit of light we do have, and it usually turns into a good time. Storms seem to give my sisters and I energy, probably through the excitement of it. We act years younger than we are, and it is a good time. My sisters (and father usually) share my enjoyment of watching storms so we tend to do that together as well. I can remember times standing in to garage watching clouds come in, both here and on vacation, as well as my sisters and I running out into the rain just because. 

4. Evidence of God. What storms can do (both good and bad) is INCREDIBLE. No other force of nature or man can eliminate electricity for millions of people, create such a spectacle as thunder and lightning, and create the havoc a storm can. I am not a big outdoors kind of girl, so while some may find the beauty of nature a way to appreciate what God has done, I tend to get distracted by my hatred for bugs, humidity and dirt, and that gets in my way. Because I can watch storms from the comfort of my own home, I can marvel at what amazing things that God can create, and the power shown in those storms. The beauty in the "show" created by God and what God can also take away in the damage. AMAZING