It has been about 3 weeks since I have last written, and I can hardly believe how much has happened in that short amount of time. Yes, in comparison to how often I usually write, that is a long time, but the amount of things that have happened, both good and bad, seems like it should have been a year. To fill you in, I even need to take out my planner to remind myself and get the timeline straight!
1. Senioritis is worse than ever. I find reasons to NOT do everything... I have zero patience for immaturity, stupidity, high school, or anything for that matter. I long for college. I can hardly stand the amount of wait I still have.
2. I feel like with certain friends with whom I thought I was drifting from, things are getting better. I have had chances to hang out, we talk a lot more and do a lot more. I think we have all sort of realize the slowly dwindling amount of time we have left with each other and we are learning to cherish it.
3. College decision is close, I can feel it. I have gotten all of my scholarship offers and after this week will have experienced a little bit more of some schools. I cannot wait to send in those papers and be able to answer the commonly asked question: "Where are you going to college?". That will be one of the biggest reliefs I have ever felt.
4. I am surprised I did not write last weekend. I was more frustrated than I have ever been. I got my wisdom teeth out, was in so much pain, could not eat anything, and on top of that I was the most emotionally stressed I have ever been. I guess it was too much to write and the situation was still developing, and I did a lot of sitting and thinking and took lots of medicine. I now can eat normal foods, now I only wait to play the clarinet again! It is driving me mad.
5. I learned A LOT over the last few weeks. I learned that friendship is one of the most important things you can have. I learned that texting is not proper communication. I learned that without face to face conversation, our generation doesn't know how to properly communicate. I learned that you need to get past reputations and accept people for who they are and what they mean to you. I learned that the phrase 'I Love You' is scary and gets tossed around way too much. I learned that I panic easily. I learned that relationships and commitment scare me. I learned that I am an indecisive person. I learned that sometimes planning ends up in disappointment. I learned that you shouldn't just act on raw emotion. I learned that you shouldn't over analyze feelings either. I learned that there are certain people I need to be more thankful for. I learned that crying can be good. I learned that I am not a great friend. I learned that I take advantage of certain friends. I learned that emotional situations can do bad things and good things.
Regardless of the crazy, emotional, stressful, hard, awful things that happened this week, I will take so much from it and grow as a person and mostly as a friend.
Thank you, you know who you are.
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